i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
