never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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