i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
