Who did Billy Mays play for?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Randomize
