dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
