Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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