Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
