I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
