I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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