we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
