The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
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