You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
