Tell her she can't have a vagina
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
