Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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