I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
