I cockslap morals
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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