in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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