It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
whose parrot is this?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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