so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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