Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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