How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
