He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I deserve this hangover.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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