Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
