oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
