I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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