he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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