I think im going to throw up on grandma
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
