i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
