The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
