That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
