there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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