I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
