): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize