For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
