our cab driver is having phone sex.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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