i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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