I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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