I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
