Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
