Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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