Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
