I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
