No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
We talked him into tasing himself.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
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