I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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