I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Randomize
