I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She even gives head with a lisp.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
