I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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