So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
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