Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize