Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
